When I got up this morning, I found that my pepper, onion powder,
cloves, and nutmeg had all escaped from the pantry.
They were standing together on the countertop, and cheerfully wished me a good morning.
And that can only mean one thing…
Seasoning’s Greetings!
[awkward pause]
Yes, No Effort November is coming to a close,
and what better topic with which to conclude the month than a pointless decorative light
filled with a mysterious clear liquid that makes bubbles thanks to the heat generated by an incandescent bulb in its base.
Oh, a lava lamp you say?
No, we just did those!
We’re talking about bubble lights!
These things!
[faint rustling as tree is shaken ever-so-weirdly]
Ever since the tradition of putting soon-to-be dead evergreen trees indoors for a month or so
was combined with the advent of electric lighting, we’ve been conceiving of wacky and wackier electrical things
to throw in our Christmas trees.
Because if there’s one thing we oughta put in a mass of drying needles,
it’s electric lights on cost-cut strings! Super safe.
But you all know of that hazard by now -
at least I hope so.
And anyway it doesn’t have anything to do with this video.
Or does it?
You see, I can force a connection between the heat hazard and these lights.
Watch.
What makes Christmas trees dry out?
Dry air and a lack of water, of course.
But what makes that go faster?
The heat generated by incandescent bulbs strung among the branches.
But what if, instead of just resigning ourselves to the fact that the heat is a wee bit dangerous,
we used that heat to create a new sort of Christmas tree light,
a light “which shall present a neat and pleasing appearance, and which shall be light in weight, durable in construction, inexpensive to produce and efficient to operate.”
Carl W. Otis made such a connection in 1941 when he conceived of and patented these silly little things.
Bubble lights, or as he put them, "ornamental illuminating devices."
Did he have any concern about the safety implications of electric lights in giant kindling cones?
Uh, probably not, but these do spread the heat generated by their bulbs over a larger surface area
and thus they don’t get as hot as a naked bulb so… I guess technically they are slightly safer.
Still, slightly safer certainly seems separate from the objectives of Carl.
He probably just wanted to make a… thing.
And these are them!
So, what are they?
Well, they’re constructed as if they are a very odd kind of light bulb -
the actual bulb in here isn’t meant to be replaced, instead you’re expected to replace
this entire thing when one goes out.
Everything is glued together - again, this entire thing, ostensibly, is the bulb.
Indeed, even in the patent, this is how it was envisioned.
No user serviceable parts inside.
Also, hang on, we need to talk about the way “Fig” is stylized here.
This is…
a lot.
And I can’t unsee what is simply Ohio with a few embellishments.
Get it together, patent attorney of the 1940’s!
I can’t even figure out what your name is,
Ulforio Arichstein?
Anyway, the key feature of this is of course this glass tube.
It’s filled with dichloromethane, sometimes also called methylene chloride.
This solvent has a very low boiling point, just 39.6 metric degrees, or 103.3 Fahrenheit.
So, you don’t need to heat it up all that much for it to boil.
Put a light bulb underneath a vial filled with the stuff and you’ll get bubbles.
Simple as that.
Fun fact! This chemical is used in one method of coffee decaffeination.
One of the most interesting things about these, to me, is that they don’t take long at all to start bubbling
and when they do, they just… go.
There’s no build-up or gradual rise, it’s just… bang!
Full bubbles!
And they actually make noise! Take a listen.
[ each light starts with a thud; then a faint rumbling can be heard akin to a boiling pot on the stove ]
After they’ve been on for a while, when you unplug them they’ll be bubblin’
for a few solid minutes before they stop.
This time, though, they do sort of just fizzle out.
Looking at the patent, it seems the vials have something designed to concentrate
the heat from the bulb in one spot for the bubbles to form,
and perhaps that’s why they start bubbling with a bang and then take so long to stop.
I’d break one of these open and take a look for myself but A) this is no effort November and 2)
I like these things and don’t want to break it so long as it works.
I’ve read that it may simply be a bit of rock salt at the bottom,
and perhaps that explains this weird crystally stuff up here on this one.
Now, you can still buy these today.
I, a midwesterner, obtained these at, say it with me now,
Menards!
but I imagine they’re available in other places, too.
But, as far as Christmas lights go these are actually pretty expensive, these were $20 a set and that’s only seven lights!
Though I snagged them at the end of last year when they were half-off.
[ with uncomfortable enthusiasm ] And I got an 11% rebate on EV-
This website I found says that they peaked in popularity in the 1970’s
and fell out of favor once the common-as-sand miniature fairy lights came into existence.
And I suppose this is corroborated by my experience growing up.
I knew only one family who adorned their Christmas tree with these things,
and I’m not gonna lie I thought it was cool as heck.
But aside from them, I’d never seen them.
Not in a public display, not any one I knew, no one else in extended family…
just that one tree in the family of my brother’s classmate.
And until I bought these I had never seen them in use anywhere else.
I really wish these had developed into something with a replaceable lamp
as I think it’s pretty dumb to throw the entire thing away.
I wouldn't be surprised if this was a contributing factor in their downfall.
Plus, of course, they’re kind of energy-intensive, though not all that bad really.
Each “bulb” consumes about 5 watts, so a set of 7 runs near 35 watts.
That’s slightly less than your average lava lamp!
And also, uh well methylene chloride isn’t the best thing to just have a vial of
casually boiling away in your house or right in front of your face as you hold it.
I mean, it’s not *that* bad but still.
Oh, and you could put these things on a dimmer and run them at maybe half-power?
That would probably still get the bubbling action going and would prolong their life significantly!
But anyway, that’s it.
That’s about all I wanted to say.
These are a neat little oddity that you can still get new
(well actually, I’m only assuming that, I haven’t been to a Menards in months what the the whole everything)
but have largely fallen by the wayside.
Jeez this video's really gonna tank my watch time metrics.
Oh well.
At least I actually didn’t put a lotta effort into this one.
Finally.
♫ festively smooth jazz ♫
Yeah, ‘cause this video is so short there weren’t that many opportunities for me to
mess up so I don’t know how many bloopers you’re even gonna see; there were a few,
but I mean…
I might not even be able to fill up the entire bloopers segment, and the thing is I know that!
That’s why I’m saying this right now.
Because, well, what am I -
I.. I can’t just end, ya know I've got..
I have some standards, this, this may be No Effort November but I gotta continue on with something.
Anyway, have you heard of lava lamps?
I found that my pepper, onion, powder …
onion powder
[laughter]
ohhh
We’ve been conceiving of wacky and wackier ideas…
electrical things
But what if… instead of just requi … resigning -
[noises of frustration]
I suppose y'all want some sort of secret caption at the end like I normally do.
Well, here it is.
It's not very good.
Welp, on to Do Things December!